I’m not sure if I truly believe in spirituality.
It’s more like… I follow it when it suits me.
Let me explain.
There are days when everything feels off. You know, those days when no matter what I do, nothing seems to go right. I feel low, restless, and kind of stuck.
On those days, I find myself listening to bhakti songs. Or I just sit quietly and talk to God. And somehow, I feel better.
It’s not like my problems vanish. But I feel lighter. Like I’ve shared something with someone who won’t judge me or interrupt me.
That feeling—of having a power greater than me to talk to—is peaceful.
It’s comforting to believe that even when nothing and no one seems to be working in your favor, there’s still something out there that listens.
But then, when life is normal or even happy, I don’t think about that power at all.
In fact, I start questioning it.
I tell myself things like, “I don’t believe in God,” or “I’m an atheist.” I think about how maybe God is just an emotion humans created to feel safe when they can’t understand or fix something.
When people are scared of the unknown, they often say, “It’s God’s will.” It’s like a way to shift the blame or avoid the discomfort of not knowing.
And yeah, I know that sounds hypocritical.
Because when I need spirituality, I embrace it. And when I don’t, I deny it.
So, I guess spirituality is important to me—but only when I need it 🙁
p.s: I find a lot of joy in sharing my stories with you guys. If you like and relate to my stories, feel free to subscribe below for similar stories, delivered (almost) daily!
